blade or die

This is a very hard part of the year. Sure, the weather sucks for a lot of people, but that’s not it.

It’s the fucking waiting.

Wait, wait, wait.

Waiting for the Bitter Cold Showdown!!!

Trade Show

The nice thing about the Bitter Cold Showdown, disregarding the the fact it’s in Detroit in February, is that it’s cheap to travel there… because it’s Detroit in February. If you’re not packing up a van and getting all the fools there at once, traveling via air is fucking cheap.

Why? Because no one—outside a few thousand rollerbladers—would ever think to travel to Detroit in February. I mean, c’mon. It’s cold, it’s dismal, and it’s easier to find an abandoned building than it is to find a person who actually looks happy to live there. I don’t blame them though. The city felt it’s share of hardship in the last few years.

But hey! You can help!

All that money you’re spending on hotel rooms, food, rental cars and everything else helps out their economy. Yay for helping!

That’s probably why Bar in Madion Heights has a sign outside that says “Welcome skaters!” That’s the spot if you’ve got a hankering to get blackout drunk and sing karaoke.

So, while you’re saving a small fortune on getting to BCSD, that only means you’ll have more money to shell out to the bargain-based pricing at the trade show.

This year, you’ll get to check out the fabled Valo Light, feed your face full of the infamous Intuition cookies, and snag tons of extra gear that you don’t even know about yet.

However, Casualty always brings the goods, so hopefully they’ll have these lovelies there:

Basically, you don’t need to bring any extra clothes with you because you can buy them all there.

Just think, for all the money you save getting there, and what you don’t have to pay in shipping and handling, you can flood the industry with your crucial bucks. Just like we’ll be doing to the area.

It feels good to give back, doesn’t it?

Comment in person

Always talking tons of shit on message boards or in the Rollernews comments? Want to really let them know what you have to say and want to make sure they hear it?

Well, if you’re ready, now is your chance to be the ultimate bad ass. You can take your giant, digital balls, haul them to Detroit, and take all that online shit-talking to the streets.

Think of all the fucking cool bullshit you can scream at the top of your lungs to everyone you have even the smallest objection to. Man, you’ll be so fucking cool they’ll just hoist you into the air.

But since I don’t recall any major brawls or anything in the last three years, I don’t think the internet bravery translates well to reality.

Skate indoors

For those bladers who have really bad winters, Bitter Cold is at least a bit of a chance to come inside and skate indoors.

However, the kids in Minnesota don’t give a fuck about that shit.

Start your own Riots!

Have you been watching the news and are really jealous of what’s been going down in Egypt? You want to fuck some shit up?

Well, then you should probably stay at the Econo Lodge in lovely Madison Heights. If they place was anything like last year, you’ll probably be part of their 10-strikes-and-you’re-out program.

Basically, you and a few hundred friends can smash and trash the place all weekend until about 2 a.m. on Sunday until anything really happens.

After that, you might get a chance to meet some police officers. If you’re really lucky, they can show you how to properly execute the DDT and then give you a new place to sleep for the night.

Sounds fun, huh?

So yeah, you won’t see me at the Econo Lodge this year. You kids have fun though.

Oh, yeah, and the comp

If you skate in Bitter Cold, I salute you.

If you go just to watch the comp, great.

If you go to express your feelings via handmade sign, even better.

Let’s go to the Trailer

If all the reasons I’ve listed weren’t enough for you to grab your parka and head up north, let’s see what BCSD founder Daniel Kinney wants you to know:

Bitter Cold Showdown XI Promo from Bitter Cold Showdown on Vimeo.

Sure, it’s no Gathering of the Juggalos, but maybe that’s for the best.

Charging premiere

Yeah, I don’t need to say shit about this. It’s going to fucking rule for so many reasons.

Five bucks at the Vibralux booth and you’re in.

So, yeah, see you there.

And I know I’m not alone. The SHOCK kids all agree Bitter Cold is the party of the year for all the right reasons.

Blade or Die,

— Brian Krans

P.S.

Again this year, I’ll be taking over the BCSD Twitter account and giving everyone live updates on what’s going on. You know, for the people with REAL reasons for not going:

• Temporary dismemberment
• Imprisonment
• Gam-Gam’s 120th birthday
• Got stuck in Germany after Winterclash because you were in a coma after winning this comp: